Once there was a little boy who liked to play on the floor. Mommy liked it when he played on the floor because then she could do other things like the laundry. But Mommy knew that when she heard a certain rumbling sound, she needed to stop doing those other things and change a diaper.
Well, yesterday, said rumbling was heard as the little boy was playing. So Mommy quickly finished what she was doing, and waited a few minutes (lest any rumbling was not over quite yet.)
Mommy picked the little boy up, carried him to his changing area (a towel on the floor in his room) and took off his pants. She noticed that some poop had escaped the confines of his diaper onto his leg, so she knew this was going to be a FULL diaper. And indeed it was. So full, in fact, that it not only crept out the leg hole, it also oozed out the back end, getting yellowy poo onto his very cute onesie. Alas, these are the days of our lives.
Mommy then noticed that the poop had quickly run onto his CLEAN diaper that was going to replace the dirty one. Dang it. So, she finished wiping off his little derriere and pulled out the once-clean-now-soiled diaper. Bare bottom on the towel. As she grabbed yet another clean diaper, a shower of tinkle sprayed upwards, causing Mommy to instinctively cover his little manhood with the NEW clean diaper. Unfortunately, the outsides of diapers are water repellent and non-absorbent. So tinkle dribbled all over his previously wiped-off bottom half, all over his changing towel, and all over Mommy's hands too!
Through some mixed-emotion giggles, Mommy sighed and lifted the diaper to inspect the damage. Much to her horror, there was a new puddle of poop under him on the towel! AHHHH!!! The little boy flashed his most innocent glance at Mommy, as if to say, "What?" She clenched her teeth, wiped as much up as she could, and then had to fold over the towel so the toxic materials didn't spread to him or dirty the fourth diaper of the diaper change.
And there was still the pooped-on onesie to reckon with. Mommy stuck a wet-wipe between the little boy's back and the dirty spot, as to not smear poop all up his back and into his hair while removing the clothing. Worked like a charm. But then clothing needed to be replaced. So Mommy went to the closet and managed to pick the single onesie that escaped the threshing floor of "too small clothes" to go home to America. Too stubborn to let it get her down, she decided to dress the little boy in that outfit. Unfortunately, this quickly turned into something resembling a hogtying contest with the baby as he attempted to squirm away from the shirt stuck over his face! After a good 10 second wrestle, Mommy took it back off, somehow managed to slip it on back on all the way over his head and then squirmed his arms through the long-sleeves that were nearly too tight.
Once Mommy and the little boy stopped fussing they managed to see an ounce of humor in the situation.
But as Mommy typed this little saga up, she heard, once again, that ominous rumbling sound...
The End.
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4 comments:
Don't you hate that?!?! When that happens to me I always think, "There's another 15 cents down the drain." Yesterday Matt was holding Caleb and he let out a HUGE poop he had been holding in all day. Hardly any was in the diaper. It was all on Matt's leg and on the floor. It was nasty, but so funny (probably because it wasn't me holding him!). :-)
ha! i don't miss those days and i'm not looking forward to the ones to come! they have the cutest giggles tho after those poops!
ok, so after posting i realized that it said i posted at 12:15pm. well it's kind of sort of like 10:20pm here. is the 12:15 your time?
Been there, done that! But, remember in those days it was cloth diapers! And every one of them were rinsed out in the toilet, washed in Dreft baby soap, and hung on the line in the sun to keep them nice and white.
Hope you had a nice vacation back home. How much longer will you be over there?
Marge
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